“Love Card” from the Virtues Reflection Cards, shared courtesy of The Virtues Project
A Sequel to “It’s So Good to Be Loved
A short form version of “Revolutionary Love”. with an extraordinary video of an interview of Valarie Kaur, is here.
“Can you explain what it is about Joanie that makes her loving?” This was a question a friend in “A Writing Room” community asked me after reading “It’s So Good to be Loved”
I don’t know all of Joanie’s secrets (I don’t even know all of mine), but I’ve discovered two. Over time, the other members of Joanie’s Zoom ‘Virtues Circle” all feel loved by her. For years, she has committed to study the Virtues Reflection Cards authored by Linda Kavelin-Popov with Dan Popov and John Kavelin.
Those of us in her Zoom groups can tell that Joanie has the intention to live ,in what is sometimes called the catastrophe or mess of life, by universal values. Her training and experience companionning groups earned the title of a Master Facilitator of The Virtues Project. I am a fanand facilitator of the Project.
Last Wednesday Joanie presented the “Love” card:“for us to reflect on, after which we all shared how we relate to the card. We read, “Love is the essence of our being. …it calls us to..hone ourselves…” Many of you are in this process of honing your characters, courageously facing challenges and shortcomings as opportunities to learn (and sometimes to pray about).
According to Linda Kavelin-Popov, co-founder of the Virtues Project, instead of feeling ashamed of shortcomings and mistakes, we can think of ourselves as lifelong learners, finding ourselves in teachable moments. In those times we can call on a virtue that we want to strengthen. As Rainer Maria Rilke said,
“Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage.”
Wednesday our Zoom Virtues Circle caught the scent of another ingredient in Joanie’s love potion. It emerged when Joanie presented a video of an interview with Valarie Kaur called “Revolutionary Love.” Joanie said that she loves Valarie Kaur and follows her.
Valarie Kaur spoke in the interview about love not being an “emotional rush”, though emotions are involved. She said, “Love is action, what we do for each other.” She called this “sweet labor. Fierce, bloody, imperfect, a choice we make again and again.”
I want to be love in action too, and not just with my dog and daughter (not in that order). Because “love is our essence” I believe all of us, deep down, (some really deep down), want to choose love “again and again.”
In the process of choosing love, I also feel called to be gentle with myself. To give some time to my inner children. When I get stuck, or am down on myself for making a mistake, I feel called to give understanding and time to process. I believe that such self-compassion is a good mix with the “sweet labor” that extends to others. It is important to give fierce, imperfect love not only to others but to the people we can forget at times—ourselves. As Rilke wrote,
“Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love.” - Rainer Maria Rilke
Back of “Love” card from the Virtues Reflection Cards, shared courtesy of The Virtues Project
Thanks so much for sharing in this story by reading.
All good reminders! Love is key!